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Why is it important to improve yourself?
Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and
insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of
“I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think
and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.-
when in reality, the fact is, most people are having the same
thoughts as we are.
You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by
herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti.
You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.”
But if you could read thru her mind, you might just be amazed that
she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here
alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive? I don’t like my ankles,
they look too skinny, I wish I was as intelligent as my best
friend.” etc.
We look at a young business entrepreneur and say
“Wow! what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the
mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes, I wonder why my
friends won’t talk to me, I hope Mum and Dad will still work things
out.”
Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them
for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places
with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. The
people we are admiring are actually just as insecure as we are. We
suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope
in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet
desperation.
I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And
in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be
interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends
tend to avoid her whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t notice how
badly she has became socially handicapped, by gradually affecting
the people in her environment.
One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to
a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up
with, even the most delicate topics you want to discuss. Ask
questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”, “Do I always
sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does
my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when are
together?”. In this way, the other person will obviously know
that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend
them your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give answers
like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” Open up
your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help
your friend with constructive criticism that will also help them
improve themselves.
One of Whitney Houston’s songs says “Learning to
love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True enough. In order to
love others, you must love yourself too. Remember, you cannot give
what you do not have.
Before telling other people how to improve
themselves, let them see that you yourself are a representation and
a product of self improvement. Self improvement makes us better
people, we then inspire others, and then the rest of the world will
follow.
Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings.
Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer, if only I
was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first
step to self improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to
others.
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We
always wish we had better things, better features, better body
parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy
about themselves. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a
matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you
are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we
begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and
happy.
Further Self Improvement resources are
available from
The Freedom
Seed
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